A notice for prospective electronics shoppers on Zakera

You know that motto, "The customer is always right?" It's a lie. A huge, misleading, lie.

The shop I run is very simple- we do electronics, and we offer it the old fashioned way- in person (Seriously, screw all this new database crap). We will repair your broken goods, and repay you money should we not fix them properly. We sell electronic goods on the side- Omni-Tools of the civilian quality (Outside of the staff, and we're all ex-military), games to kill time on said Omni-Tools, basic self-defense applications like a combat drone's taser, and if you're willing to fork out a significant sum of money, a tech armor.

But we do not, do not sell to minors. If you have ID, and it checks out, buy away. If you are underage, you are from here on out NOT going to be sold the majority of goods in the store. And no- getting your mother or father in to buy the Incinerate for you won't work. If anyone tries that tactic, I will seriously consider putting some viruses in place of the item.

I'm sorry, I'm not making a good first impression and I realize that, but I just came out of a two-hour argument with this family of three who wanted me to give their kid some ultra-violent piece of crap.

tldr: Don't ever believe anyone when they say running a shop is more peaceful than charging a husk swarm with an Omni-Blade and a Predator (THANKS SYSTEM ALLIANCE).

Also yeah, standard stuff about if you're a member of the Alliance, you get a discount.

Yeah, you're going to get a lot of faceplates trying to take your shit assbrain

Hope you like that!

So you wont sell me the good shit so I can give it to my pup? For shame, her birthday is comin up.

So what happens when you're dealing with an asari minor?

Or a hanar.

Or an elcor.

Or a salarian.

I feel like you should be thinking this system through for a little while if you want to cater to a wide range of demographics.

So... what sort of games do you sell that you feel the need to explicitly note that you don't deal with minors at all?

He sells incinerate apps.

I'm not totally sure why you don't understand how selling these to minors is a terrible idea.

It's more a general notice to humans and turians. I'll sell to anyone if they're mature and close enough to the age limit.

Don't you need a special omni tool to run an incinerate app? Like military grade?

I don't think so, I have it on mine

Heyo, as I asked towards your welcome post, do you carry some Ariake's entertainment line?

I do electronic dance costumes and flashy stuff for stage drones for them I guess that'd be a tad special but who knows? Also, it could explain the adults only thing. Not every parent would like their kids to fence it out with newly purchased omni-toys, acting as if they were omni-blades!

I don't think we have them in stock right now, but I can order some if we don't and have them in in about a week.

Define "Flashy stuff." I know a quarian who can make drones do just about anything under the sun, so we may be able to get the drones sorted out soon.

I don't doubt your quarian knows a ton more tricks than I do!
It started out when a friend of mine and I were preparing equipment for a stage show. The drone would coordinate cloak fields, project holos and do a lot of light effects. A dancer most of the time can't wear heavy gear and I managed to fix this and the energy source into the drone so we only had to wear small emitter grids, basically invisible or concealed in some dress items.

Ariake bought the license. You can see my stuff under their "electronic costume" label. It is actually derived from tech armor technology.

Really? Fascinating. Well, I did a quick inventory search, and we have some Ariake gear. The Quarian I was talking about earlier's off for today. You can stop by tomorrow and we can fit you out!

Ha, thanks, but since I currently reside on Illium, I may be excused until I visit the Citadel next time!

Ah. I guess this may be a bit much to put on a public forum, but if you give me your shipping address, I'll see what I can do.

I don't need anything right now, but thanks. I have premium access to Ariake's lines as a contracted developer.
Maybe I was causing confusion there. Sorry if so.

And I'm not totally sure you caught the part where he said he also sold omni-tools, omni-tool repair services, and non combat related omni-tool apps and games. All of which are services young people seek out just as frequently as adults, and services they're all entitled to seek out without having to worry about having someone drop a virus on their equipment for daring to ask the guy who also sells combat-apps they don't intend to buy.

And, for the record, we already have enough adults out there with incinerate and other mobile EFSes that blow up in their faces when they try to run them on civilian tools that aren't rated for them. I do hope you're keeping mindful of the relevant bylaws, Rampant, I believe you'll find they largely agree with your 'no selling bombs to kids' motto.

Welcome to the site, Mr. Jones. I hope you'll generate additional business.
I'll drop in when I'm in Zekera next time.
Not that I am looking for anything specific but you know how it is, sometimes you just find something while browsing and a friendly chat is never wrong!

Also, I would like to try and cheat the probability vortex this site tends to create. You suddenly run into people from here all over the place.

I should clarify that I'm just not selling the BIG stuff to kids- like the Incinerate Apps. Kids can buy child-friendly Omni-Tools just fine here.

I just posted that because I'd had, in a row, five parents buying games that had torture, slavery and genocide.

And I thought Reaper War: Destroy Your Own Planet was harsh for people...

My shit. Il be in for a copy and a new omni tool tomorrow. You do carry Serrice councel gear, dont you?