The Official Private Messages Thread.

PM to Taleeze It sounds like a date :p

We'll see you there!

Private Message to IndigoIceMaid Alystae,

I felt we had a very productive meeting the other day. I appreciate your support as one of my constituents, and I look forward to working with you closely over the coming years to help make our district, our ward, and our station a better place for everyone.

I hope we can meet again very soon.

Best,
Max

P.S. I somehow ended up with your underwear. Should I just mail that to you?

Encrypted message to Arina Caenis/>Welcome! Please confirm reader credentials.
/>>...
/>>...
/>>...
/>>Reader credentials cleared.
/>>>Level: diplomatic
/>>>Sub-classification: Citadel
/>>>Security clearance: EYES ONLY
/>Opening message...
File header: 536353-325437-gtdfrt
Good morning, Ms Caenis,

Your sacrifices have not gone unnoticed - despite the forum's terrorist history, relatively small active user size and, as you mentioned, extranet varrenshit, it does represent a fairly accurate microcosm of the wider galaxy. Thank you for your help.

Following your request, I have attached the keys to access the individual's level 1 profile.

I have also attached (below) a copy of a preliminary Departmental analysis of the subject, based on classified information. While incomplete, my Director trusts that it will aid your understanding of the individual.

It goes without saying that the contents of this message and all attachments are strictly confidential.

If you have any queries or concerns, please do not hesitate to contact me.

Kind regards,

Aurelia Meris

Departmental Officer
SFG678TT, Thessia

Thought for the day: No maiden is a monolith.

Preliminary Analysis of Class Three Listed Individual Nassa D'Veyra
Undertaken by ███████ ███████████

Summary

Psychologically, Nassa D'Veyra displays marked anti-social behaviour bordering on the sociopathic. However, detailed analysis of her involvement in and leadership of military operations on ███████████, █████, ███ █████, ███████ and ██████ suggests a level of tactical and strategic leadership slightly greater than Huntress average (within margin of error). Politically, from what Departmental spiders have gathered, the individual appears to possess a strong degree of attachment to Republican ideals, although any analysis of the depth of her beliefs can only be confirmed by extensive interview. It is this analyst's opinion that Nassa D'Veyra may prove a suitable asset, but further observation and intensive contact would be required to ascertain her suitability beyond any reasonable doubt.

Current Location

[Redacted]
Separation from Eclipse

Intelligence received fro High Command indicates that, prior to the actions on ██████████, Nassa D'Veyra travelled to Earth under a false identity for the purpose of killing an associate, one ██████ ██████. However, Systems Alliance Military Police reports indicate that Nassa D'Veyra instead murdered ██████ ██████'s family - currently, the Systems Alliance is holding ██████ ██████ equally responsible for the crime due to their shared Eclipse background, but in-depth analysis confirms that Nassa D'Veyra would have killed her associate on sight.

Following these crimes, the Systems Alliance has placed a bounty of c██████ for the return of Nassa D'Veyra to Alliance jurisdiction to face criminal charges. In response, and fearing possible sanctions, the Eclipse Sisterhood expelled her and imprisoned her in █████████ █, where she was freed by Strike Force ██████.

Political Views

Without an in-person interview, political views (and the depth of those views) are notoriously difficult to gauge. However, based on data mining of the individual's extranet communications, Nassa D'Veyra appears to hold political views consistent with Departmental goals (Republican pride, pre-eminence of the 'asari way', openness to cooperation with other species, &c.).

Psychological Report

...

(The list continues for quite some time. Aside from the occasional rows of ████████, the documents paint an accurate picture of D'Veyra)

Encrypted diplomatic burst, priority C: SFG678TT, Thessia File header: 536354-325437-gtdfrt
Greetings, Miss Meris

I received the files, an interesting read.
While I am somewhat concerned about the mental stability of the subject, my opinion is that her value could easily outweigh the risks. It seems to be a matter of motivation, I have doubts about simple controllability of the subject.

If I can be of any further assistance in this matter, please let me know. I have recently worked with Guards Speaker Paruun of Nevos several times and can recommend her for operations.

Meanwhile, I continue observation.

Kind regards,
Arina Caenis

Asari Embassy, Citadel

Email to natalie.king@samc.mil.ex from sarah.thompson@san.mil.ex

Natalie,

I apologize for popping by unannounced. I was not in the best place, and I've spoken with a psychologist and later my therapist.
All the stress I've been going through has caused me to behave erratically and I'm on the path to fixing this. Again, I'm sorry for my odd behavior and showing up out of nowhere.

Sarah Thompson

Email To: sarah.thompson@san.mil.ex
From: natalie.king@samc.mil.ex Hey Sarah

It was good to see you. I'm glad to hear you're seeing someone though, I imagine everything's been pretty overwhelming lately.

You still on leave?

-Nat

Email to natalie.king@samc.mil.ex from sarah.thompson@san.mil.ex
I'm still on leave for the next two weeks, then I go to work. I'm hiring a nanny to watch my Albie when I'm not around.

I've gotten a lovely welcome back card and flowers from my squad on my coffee table and they told me that they're all pulling for me and glad I'm coming back. I haven't felt that kind of camaraderie in a long time. I cried a lot.

encrypted email to Assemblyman Max VallarioNo need for such gestures, think of it as spoils of war. I think the real surprise was you not wetting yourself when you saw my armor stand and melee weapon. My last guest couldn't even finish his drink when he saw my 'husk be good' stick, I believe the humans like to call it a sledgehammer. Oh, good form finishing the bottle, I must say, I'm quite impressed.

Private Message to: Celeste, asari_​promiscuity I owe you both an apology for my earlier comments. Though they were intended to be humorous in their audacious flippancy, on sober reflection I see that they were merely cruel.

Please understand that I did not mean it as an attack on your honour, or to insinuate with any degree of seriousness that the pair of you were involved in any illicit or secret manner.

I am truly sorry for the offense.

Private Message to Doctor Love No need at all to apologise (although if it really is bothering you, then apology accepted, of course) - I took it pretty much exactly as I think your intention was, there was certainly no offence felt.

Love,
Daia

Private Message to IndigoIceMaidI'm in politics. You don't get into this field without first building an iron-will. Between that, and the war, I thought your "Husk Be Good" stick was quite charming.

As for the bottle, I surprised myself to be honest. I guess I still have game. Took me back to my old academy days...

...Well, that and the moves we pulled off during our third go around.

[Geth Encrypted Vmail to User:SmokeMs. Mir,

I know you said that you had no intention of finding work through this board, but as I'm sure you'll find, reading comprehension has never been a feature of life on CDN.

The company I represent, the Srivastava-Walker Conglomerate, is looking for a retrieval specialist for a very delicate assignment and you come very highly recommended indeed. I, however, am not convinced. If you want the contract, you have 24 hours to persuade me.

Go.

Yours sincerely,

Emerencia Amantani

Vice President, SWC Research and Development

Ms Amantani,

It is a pleasure to be considered for such a task, but I have a few provisos (I can't profess to be the biggest or the best CRS out there, but I'm good enough that I can afford to pick my clients).

If you're looking for somebody who can storm a Blood Pack fortress single-handedly and ride a kakliosaur off into the sunset, you have the wrong person.

I specialise in retrieval - not from a warzone, or by killing, but by asking nicely.

I speak five human languages fluently (Urdu, Hindi, English, French and Chinese), am a very skilled infiltrator, have contacts throughout Alliance space and the corporate world and I once stole a moon with nothing but a nice dress and a pretty smile.

If the 'delicate' part of this operation means you want no casualties, no suspicion and your item back safely, I'm your woman. If not, then I'd be happy to recommend some colleagues.

Kind regards,

Sana Mir

"Encrypted Message to Mr. SandmanGreetings.

I see that you are claiming to be one Nikolai Aleksanders, who if I'm not mistaken is the CEO of the rising corporate star that is the Titan Corporation. How might one go about politely requesting your proving the veracity of this claim? I have a vested interest in opening communication with Mr. Aleksanders for business-related purposes. If you are indeed Mr. Aleksanders, please respond with proof of your identity. If not, please say so and I promise I won't tell the real one.

Sincerely,
Jacob Frost, CEO
Universal Motor Works

Private Message to User: VahruunLook. Okay. It was late. I was bored. It was dumb alright? It was dumb, I was dumb, and honestly, now I'm just kinda relieved. Because this whole thing, this right here, is getting waaaaaaaay too out of hand. I mean Jesus fuck I am not comfortable with the idea of talking trash with terrorists and Matriarchs and God knows what else like I'm doing now.

I mean when I started it out it was going to be my little creative writing project you know? Pick random corpy guy, snark it up with his persona and maybe if I'm good/unlucky enough I'll get my fifteen minutes, get some notice, and maybe someone'll actually start taking a look at my manuscripts when I mail them in (I know they're not great but I'd appreciate someone actually giving them a chance I mean c'mon).

Also I...well honestly there's just not much to do here besides farming and that's all robotized. It was

it was just something to pass the time okay?

I'm sorry I don't have anything for you, I don't actually have his e-mail or anything, and I just

I know I can't force you to do anything but I'd really, really appreciate it if you kept this to yourself alright? I...um don't really want to bring any retaliation down on my head or anything okay?

-Dumbass Would-be Writer

Encrypted Message to Mr_Sandman
You sir, have clearly rendered sarcasm unto an art form. Bravo! Is this something that you practice at, or is it a side effect of frequenting this forum? Also, hello Mr. Aleksanders. I highly doubt anyone in your service has the gall to pose as you from within one of your own EPs, especially with the vitriol your post history seems to be showering the forum with. That can not possibly be conducive to one's well-being. I did not want to take that route of identification, but your response seems to indicate that you would not indulge me if I had not.

I am quite pleased that you saw fit to respond, albeit not quite in the manner your reputation would indicate. I must ask, however: have I presented myself as being unfit for conversation with you by asking nicely? If that is the case, then I would much appreciate some tutelage from yourself on proper etiquette with Omegan corporate warlords. In return, I would of course be happy to negotiate a favor or monetary compensation of appropriate value, whichever you choose.

If you are wondering why I did not just use your publicly linked contact addresses, it is because I suspected that you might do as I have and mostly ignored them. Forgive me if I am being presumptuous in projecting onto you in this manner, but I promise I have what I believe to be good reason for doing so. After all, rising stars attract attention, which in turn draws it away from the ones already in place, and I can imagine no small amount of animosity towards you from those you have surpassed and those who feel threatened by your arrival on the scene. Therefore, from my perspective, it stands to reason that you probably have to have programs or personnel in place whose purpose it is to filter out the cascades of hate mails you must be getting from programs and/or personnel whose purpose it is to send them. I wished to not have my communiques lost among those.

Oh! Terribly sorry! I am rambling. Anyway, might you by any chance indulge me in a meeting at the Tomorrow's Dream in Tayseri sometime this weekend? I know it is old-fashioned, but I much prefer to speak in person. If you wish to retain an approximation of anonymity for the conversation, there is the possibility of engaging in the Winter Holiday Masquerade taking place there.

Private Message to User: VahruunI...no dude seriously. I'm not him. I (me or dumb jagoff on random agri-world A) am not (means no) Him (Omegan corporate...warlord thingy).

Me!= Him.

I can't talk business because I don't own one. I can't be your super-besty CEO bromentor because I'm still in uni. I don't scheme about shit like this I just write.

...Apparently not too badly either if this is seriously a problem.

Look man, I don't know who you are and I don't want to go to a masked ball with you. I probably couldn't afford the transit even if I did.

Just...leave me alone okay?

Please?

-Dumbass Would-be Writer No Seriously I Don't Want In Any of this Shit

PM to Mr_SandmanI see you are adamant in your refusal about this. Suit yourself. I will not press you any further. I apologize for troubling you.

Private Message to Sarah Thompson

The funds I've sent should be in your account within the next day. I'll have Albert back in your good graces by next Sunday.

Thank you for allowing me to see and keep him for a little while. I'm sorry for everything.

Private Message to Asari_Promiscuity

Daia,

I have officially stepped out of my comfort zones.

I went on a blind date with an Asari, in which we had steaks at an elevated restaurant in Kithoi. She seemed nice at first, but the more I spoke with her, she really seemed like she was dating humans as a phase. She kept asking about human culture and not about me, with most of the conversation being held about the steaks and human vat-grown food. It was all-in-all a fairly boring date.
I tried to smile and nod, hoping things would get better, but eventually she made a crack about eezo chemical spills or some shit.
Said that human biotics were little more than us tipping our toes into something we knew little about. At this point, I was just smiling and nodding and letting her talk, but I .. it was really, really grating.

[image: Sarah's deadpan expression, the photo slightly over-exposed and in a dark kitchen, presumably her apartment at night.]
That being said, I'm trying to get back out in the field, as it were. I'm working again, I'm going back to the dating market, and I'm trying to smooth things over with Chris as much as my sanity will allow it. I've got another blind date set up for tomorrow, thanks to an extra-net site I've joined up on. How are you doing? I've heard that you're having a holiday party at Apricity? If I can find a sitter or a nanny, I'll do my best to pop over to Illium. That being said, Albert is my responsibility and I need to be here for him the majority of the time. He needs his mother, you know, and Chris.. well, she.. egh.


I really, really would like to attend the party. I'll have to see, I'll get back with you.


Yours,

Sarah Thompson

ps: WRITE ME BACK!