[Hungry Tides Restaurant, Ciadel] Schmeerskahoven! (Open)

Laykalar paused after hearing Taleeze's question. Whether he was motivated to do so by embarrassment, awkwardness or an uncharacteristic melancholy would be hard to tell. Even he was not entirely sure. He had brought the doll with him because he tended to do so when he was feeling insecure; the hanar were a sociable people, for all their elaborate rites governing interaction, and even a place as wondrous as this couldn't always stave off the loneliness. He knew this was why he carried the toy, but he hadn't been willing to really think about it. He hadn't yet tried to actually speak to anyone about the doll, or what it meant to him.

The words of an old teacher came back to him:

"The Enkindlers did not bestow upon these ones gifts intending that their recipients should lack for courage in using them. Where there exists the mind, there exists the word, and the duty - as dictated by tenets of courtesy - to show respect for these ones' benefactors through engaging in its use".

Hoping he would sound coherent, he addressed Taleeze.

"This one once found enjoyment in the doll as a polyp. Its purpose in carrying the item now is more in keeping with its current role as a student; it considers the doll a cultural relic. The doll is a Nokatok, a creature native to the Banks of the Zaythanal Formation. The creature was akin to what asari or humans might term a "national mascot". This one's doll is intended to represent the protagonist character from a tale teaching correct etiquette and awareness of the need to honour the Enkindlers through use of their gifts. It is titled, "The Little Dancing Nokatok Provokes Most Inelegant Loss Of Face Among The Selfish Harvesters". This one has always enjoyed the story!"

He drooped slightly, or seemed to, as a surge of sadness overcame him.

"Most distressingly, this one reports that the Banks of the Zaythanal Formation were destroyed during the Great Storm of the Reapers. Although these ones were spared the devastation on many other planets, as Kahje's defences held under siege, several outlying regions were destroyed, including Zaythanal. This one has not, it supposes, been willing to forget its origins. It must acknowledge its tendency to use the doll as a substitute for the familiar and comfortable".

It was a bit sad to hear the story of the destruction of Laykalar’s home. Of course it made sense to Taleeze that he kept meaningful mementos of the time and the location. Cities could be rebuilt under certain circumstances but natural formations like reefs were forever lost.

“I share your sorrow, Laykalar. But it seems you have your home in your heart and carry it wherever you drift.” Did hanar have hearts? Taleeze decided to plex this later in the hotel. Anyway, she hoped he’d get the image.

“How do your studies come along, have you met many others to exchange views? I think your work brings you in contact with many unusual examples of every species. I follow a line of work where I also meet a lot of people, I mostly work as an entertainer and dancer. Unfortunately ever so often intellectual exchange is not among their primary interest. It is fellow dancers that I have the most interesting talks with. Some of them have travelled all over the galaxy.

Friendships are sometimes hard to maintain but I can say I have found new additions to what I call family.”

She gently put one hand atop of Skylar’s. She also had to think of Daia and Ana who had been so kind to her for no reason.

"I understand," Skylar said, as Laykalar shared his story. "I'm from Bekenstein, originally. The reminders I have, I cherish them." She felt it best not to go into detail - for one thing, while (she hoped) knowing of the similarity in experiences might be some comfort to the hanar, she didn't feel it was a topic either of them needed to go into further, and for another, she had no idea how to explain corsetry in terms that would make it any more meaningful than 'article of clothing'.

She glanced at Taleeze and raised her hand slightly into her palm, welcoming the contact and stroking the asari's fingertips with her thumb.

"The others understand" Justicar declared ominously. Whatever it was she had judged about them based on their answers, it had apparently satisfied the notion that these two would be appropriately awed and submissive before the Last of the Enkindlers, or at least receptive to Their Truth. She drifted off towards the offered-for-one's-consumption-as-one-chooses table and started loading up a plate.

Laykalar suddenly noticed, with a slight shock, that Julian Snow had joined the restaurant's denizens. He hadn't been paying attention to the full range of his visual input, but then again Snow had no doubt entered quietly and unobtrusively, as was his wont. The human seemed content to watch the scene before him without interfering, but Laykalar cheered upon seeing him. Had he been looking for Laykalar?

Snow was always helpful to talk with; he had a way with words, as simple as those words could be. Most hanar required complex and elevated speech to convey the more profound meanings, but in his blunt, straightforward language - informed by the intensity of his wartime experiences - Snow had served as a living reminder that wisdom was enkindled in many variant forms.

"This one too has succeeded in finding new friends" he told the couple, subtly gesturing with a tentacle. "If this one may be excused for a moment, it shall return and continue conversing very shortly!".

He made his way over to Snow.

"Good evening, Mr. Snow!

It offer apologies for not greeting you sooner; it did not see you enter. It would certainly be very glad for your company; it suspects you have come here to find it, and it is thankful. Would you join us?" He gestured back to the asari and the human, while flashing a friendly "smile" across his front.

Snow wasn't a social person, so Laykalar wasn't sure he'd accept.

"Laykalar?" Looking up from the dish of overpriced seafood, Snow seeing his erstwhile co-worker with a doll in tow, and his posture seemed more subdued to the human. Slowly standing up, the red hood looking up at his usually energetic, philosophical LTD colleague, "naw, the boss didn't send me. Came out here looking for you, you seemed a bit out of sorts when the kidnapping hit the extranet." The charity worker keeping his voice down as he glanced over at the three individuals, the other hanar getting another plate, the other two were a frivolous looking blueback smiler and an equally frivolous human woman. The human's blond hair the only thing that stood out to Snow. Turning back to Laykalar, the red hood thought for a moment before nodding in assent,

"Sure, couldn't hurt to meet and greet a bit, lead the way Laykalar."

"This one admits to being distressed" he said quietly. "It thanks you for your perceptiveness; it was in fact thinking earlier that it would benefit from your company". He found himself moving in a manner that would have conveyed trust and companionship to another hanar, body language that a human wouldn't pick up on. But then Laykalar had difficulty reading the muscle spasms that conveyed human emotion. The Enkindlers were truly wise, he reflected, to ensure that all beings would be receptive to the gift they had given the hanar; by granting them the Word, which crossed boundaries that the lower, more instinctive communications couldn't overcome. And yet his people all too often kept themselves apart from the other races, neglecting that bridge which the universality of the Word, whether it was light or sound, suggested should be crossed if they were truly to seek wisdom.

As they made their way over, Laykalar explained: "It does not wish to risk being discourteous, and it has found the others with which it has been conversing pleasant and interesting. It has heard it said that social activities help remove one's mind from any riptides in which it has become trapped. It would like to keep its mind off of its confusion for as long as possible".

As he rejoined them, the asari and the human studied the new arrival.

"This one apologizes once more for the break in conversation! It wishes to introduce the respectable Julian Snow, a personal friend of this one's".

Now there was a surprise. Taleeze and Skylar exchanged glances when Laykalar drifted over to that lone human.
The asari nodded farewell to the preaching hanar who obviously seemed satisfied about the result it had achieved or their ‘beliefs’… Taleeze wasn’t aware she had said anything relevant but who knows what that weird cult was about after all. No harm done. So she shrugged, smiled at her lover and just continued eating. But it wasn’t for long when the hanar came back with the somewhat cranky looking human in tow.

“Snow? Oh, that can’t be.” Taleeze laughed at the introduction, she had thought about this earlier but hadn’t recognized Laykalar’s name. “Then you’re WavesHaveBroken and Snow on CDN, right? Nice to meet you, I just didn’t recognize your name immediately, I’m sorry.” She extended a hand for a greeting towards the human. “Mr. Snow, I am Taleeze, this is Skylar Sinclair. Please take a seat.”

The table was just big enough, now that the other hanar had drifted off.

"Don't be an ass...", the red hood thinking to himself, reining his irritated look in, replaced by a cool detached demeanor. Snow nodding to Laykalar, allowing the hanar to make the introductions, trying not to chuckle at the 'respectable' addition, "Infamous is a better description", Snow thinking as he lowered his hood, revealing the cool, vacant stare of his as he turned to Taleeze and Skylar, finding a seat across from them, the ex-marine making eye contact, his cold grey stare meeting the asari's as he refused the handshake with a courteous reply,

"Apologies ma'am, not much for personal contact, it's nice to meet both you and Ms. Sinclar." Sitting down across from the couple, Snow's face showing a hint of his latest escapade, a small cut on his right eyebrow as he settled in, giving the blonde human a cool yet cordial nod. Glancing over at Laykalar, the red hood shrugged at the revelation of his posts on CDN before continuing, "I post on occasion though afterwards, I wish I didn't. I mainly stay on the boards just to keep up with current events. My employer and Laykalar, they're the ones who make full use of the boards." Keeping his face noncomittal, Snow paused, deciding to let Laykalar take the lead in small talk, an art that the red hood neglected over the past two years.

"Pleased to meet you Mr. Snow," Skylar said smoothly, returning the nod. "I'm a foreigner to the forum myself. It seems to have found a way to snare me anyway," she added, with a quick grin and wink at Taleeze. "Crafty little forum."

"It might be fun and games for most ma'am, but for me, the only goddamned warning I got about the Bliss Festival was CDN. It's going to be the devil's luck if I manage to keep some of the duct rats away from the displays and events." Snow retorting cooly, already dreading the sex industry coming to Tayseri. Quickly pushing the thought from his head, the red hood took a swallow of tea, looking back up at Laykalar, deciding to get matters back on track.

"So what's on your mind Laykalar, or is it something you don't want to talk about in public?" Snow looking back up at Laykalar, the ex-salvager's eyes betraying a hint of concern despite his face remaining impassive.

"This one hadn't considered that" he said quietly, in reference to mention of the upcoming Bliss Festival. The cross-species compatibility aspect intrigued him, but Snow obviously feared the youngsters' attraction would be focused more on matters unsuitable for beings of their age.

Yet another distraction for his already over-burdened employer.

He liked the asari and the human - Taleeze was a name he indeed recognized from the forum, though he hadn't assumed this was her upon hearing the name - and since the hanar zealot was still filling her plate across the room, he decided he might as well include the entire table in the discussion. The fact that these others were fellow posters on CDN meant that certain matters would be easier to discuss. Then again, he might not be the only one affected by recent news.

"It is feeling a sense of helplessness, and of inadequacy" he admitted. To Taleeze and Skylar: "The others may be aware of the distressing situation with the other known as "VigilantVanguard". It is alarmed, but it is not concern alone that is troubling it. It trusts that the situation will be resolved. But there is nothing this one can realistically do to assist, nor can it offer advice or comfort to those greater affected than itself. It is too inexperienced and too far removed from any position of helpfulness. It feels... unmoored.

It knows it is doing useful work with the charity, and its studies have been productive, but at present it feels it is not adequate to the wider galaxy. And then it feels selfish for focusing on itself".

Taleeze raised her eyebrows at snow's reply. What a strange person.It seemed like, despite his civility, he didn't really want to be here. She shrugged and continued eating, when Laykalar explained his concerns.

"I don't know. I think you're on a wrong path there. You're trying to make a notable difference, that's noble but you can never know what kind of impact you have. The work at LTD is for the long run and will make a great difference in the future, when all those kids you helped will be important people. It's kind of like your own spawn in a way. It would be lost without your effort. But now all the young polyps can catch a drift and settle somewhere to help build the galactic reef." She took a sip from her drink.

"Sarah... yes, that's a mess. I also hope it gets resolved quickly." she murmured.

"It's not wrong to think like that Laykalar." the ex-salvager's soft, yet rough voice interjecting. "Feeling powerless in a situation like that is well, goddamn natural. It's why most news feeds were blocked by my unit during the war. The despair, anger and sense of inadequacy can paralyse." Looking down at his tea thoughtfully, Snow's eyes darkening at the mention at the war. "Keep it together Snow," thinking to himself as he searched for something to say, remembering a phrase his grandpa, Matthias would say when the inevitable bad news presented itself,

"The events involving the ex-cerbie remind me of a phrase I really hate Laykalar, 'it is what it is'."

Skylar nodded her agreement when Taleeze and Julian reassured Laykalar.

"We all need to tend to our own happiness from time to time," she offered. "Otherwise we'd be in no fit state to do any good at all. Taleeze has been telling me about your charity since we met Michelle the other night. It sounds admirable work - and demanding, I'm sure."

She had heard about Sarah via Daia - the whole notion of Cerberus had always appalled her, but despite a certain knee-jerk reaction to the mere name, she accepted her friend's assessment of the woman as a person. Besides, she didn't believe in some theoretical scales of good and bad: wishing ill on anyone - let alone an innocent child-to-be - only added to the galaxy's woes.

"We can only pray," she said quietly.

"One other thing about the Waller snatching caught my attention Laykalar, they knew her by name, and what she actually did for Cerberus. It's a vengeance operation, but it's strange, why didn't the 'vigilantes' just kill her and be done with it?" Snow remarking as he downed the last of the tea, thinking about the unusual nature of the kidnapping. The 'terrorists' didn't ask for a ransom, they didn't display a dead body, "So what is the point of the crime besides vengeance? A demonstration?" The red hood thinking to himself before voicing his brief opinion to Laykalar,

"Honestly, if Ms. Thompson-Waller did half the things the kidnappers are accusing her of, well, if I was in their shoes I'd be seriously considering payback. They lost family members to the yellow and white brigade, only to see the Alliance giving Cerberus operatives cushy deals. The grief and unfairness of it all can drive individuals mad sometimes," the last delivered almost sadly, as if the ex-salvager was trying to remember a more peaceful time.

Taleeze did only know as much as what had been posted on the extranet forums. What kind of source was that actually?
"Maybe they weren't thinking past just getting her in the first place. Or they what to strike a deal with the Alliance for their or pardon." Which would be a bit desperate and stupid but still in the realm of possibility. Sometimes such actions weren't that rational - maybe it was in their galaxy of thinking.

"I just don't know enough to make even an educated guess."

That was the recurring theme to their advice, he supposed; they didn't know. They could only wait for things to settle, and then continue on, adapting to the new reality where and when they could. His own chosen name on the boards expressed similar sentiments - so why had he neglected its wisdom? The others were accepting of their current helplessness - was it arrogance that he was not? Or - and a thoughtful calm settled over him - was this just the inevitable trough to the crest of his delightful time on the Citadel? The waves continued eternally, after all. That was simple truth. Perhaps he'd erred in holding so strongly to the view of the Great Storm's aftermath as a settled time, as though storms of any size would somehow not come again. He thought of Justicar, still across the room, and the zeal with which she'd embraced her heretical worldview. He had embraced the myriad worlds of the galaxy - had delighted in increasing his own comprehension of its truths by immersing himself in study of alien perspectives - with similar zeal. The last few months had been everything he had ever anticipated and hoped for. Perhaps, having adapted to that world with such vigour, he was not accustomed to confronting the eternal tides of fortune and personal struggle which defined all life, whether back on Kahje or out here, among the stars.

He had been "running away".

The thought shamed him. None but a polyp could expect to maintain its hold indefinitely. Perhaps he was still in the process of maturing.

He addressed all three of his companions.

"It believes it understands what it is the others are arguing. It is thankful for their perspective. Please excuse this one its temporary weakness; it has been so eager to make a home here, outside of the Primacy and its structures, that it does not respond well to reminders that this is not -" - a twinge of humour, with a splash of his more characteristic eagerness - "-'the Land of Mammary Secretions and Insect Preservative'. It has studied extensively, but it finds at times like this that it has little capacity for handling the more tempestuous realities, and this is humbling".

He was particularly interested in Snow's reaction. He believed his human friend would understand, having hinted at his own philosophical journey - rough tides indeed - over the months they had known each other. He had taken note of Snow's comments on the motives of the Deeds-Not-Words extremists (those uncouth enough to believe that action took precedence over correctly structured conversation were, he reflected as an aside, unlikely to be reasoned with); had Laykalar not known the human better, he might have been disturbed. But then such was the value of his acquaintance with the former soldier. As alarming as the often random brutality of the galaxy could be, those who stood on the thin line between a chaotic universe and the order of a people whom they were required to keep safe knew that on occasion the rules must bend if they weren’t to break before time. It was a lesson he too had learnt in his own way. The Primacy was too rigid, too reluctant to bend the standards of decorum to accommodate others.

Snow's path had been a difficult one. It still was; that much was always clear.

Waves had broken. But waves were always breaking, and always would be. He thought too of something Taleeze and her fellow asari had often posted on CDN: "Tides Are".

This evening, in this restaurant, another wave was breaking. And from here he would go on, and adapt. And life would go on. Tides were.

The cheerfulness began to glimmer again, beneath the gloom.



(Finish)