The Official Private Messages Thread.

Text message to Emon Rupo holy shit rupo i saw what happened on nasurn on the news. you have family there right? are they okay?????

PM to <Kayana> Hey,

Okay I don't have much time, but I found this cheap flight (like 15 credits) to Earth but I had to leave immediately, I couldn't even head back home to pack.

Sorry that I didn't get a chance to say goodbye but yeah... could you do a favor and head to my place and clean-out my fridge. Don't worry I can get the essential stuff before I head out in the desert.

See you soon.

Hadas.

Omnitext to Amandadon't wanna talk about it over text. do you still have that grass stuff?

STG SUPER PRO wrote:

Text Message to Emon Rupo uh yeah. meet me at the usual place.

u gonna be okay? :(

Omnitext to AmandaNo I just wanna forget for a while. c u in an hour.

PMto Harrad_01 Hey Harrad. Been a while, hasn't it?

So, uh... I still owe you for, well, all that you did for me last year. I thought, maybe I can buy you lunch, reminisce about old times and that kind of stuff, yeah? Just let me know when you have some free time, dude. Otherwise I will extranet stalk you till you reply.

Seriously.

:D

Alright, see ya around.

PM to Ana'Therion vas NedasSeriously, though, what exactly is your problem with an attempt at metahumor?

Automated response to user nq29 You remind me strongly of someone I dislike. Please leave.

Encrypted message to CoronaGreetings Ms D'Veyra! First of all thank you again for your help on the colony problem, it was very useful. As a thanks please find enclosed a 1000c discount on any Slaves4Us service (slave, entertainment, clothes... here is the brochure).
I'll be on Omega for a little while, and I believe you wanted to talk about possible business. If you're still interested, I'm available.

Encrypted message to SamuelGreetings Mr Vargas! First of all thank you again for your help on the colony problem, it was very useful. As a thanks please find enclosed a 1000c discount on any Slaves4Us service (slave, entertainment, clothes... here is the brochure).

PM to: Jeral the Improbable wrote:Jeral!

It's good to know you weren't extranet stalking me before! <3
I'm definitely game for that. Hopefully I won't be too weird, but I'm getting the sense that I've been cooped up here far too long. Let me know! And don't worry about it. I'm sure you would've done the same.

Attached is my schedule, since you'll have to catch me when I'm free. Let me know what works.

See you!
Harrad.

From: Sundowner77 To: D. Wilde

...are you serious?

Challenge accepted, but I gotta wonder why. You sweet on the Hierarchy these days?

PM to asari_promiscuity Hey Daia

I got my Ticket for the Blasto Con!
Only a one day pass as Eafina couldn't reschedule everything because of me but I am in:)

Tonight I am at the club and you most likely not so I wanted to ask if you wanted to go shopping a bit tomorrow? I have a few credits that I kind of like to spend on stuff. There was this Boutique you wanted to show me and that reopened fetish store was on our list as well.

So drop me a line if you have time. Vale can handle the office!
And say hi to Ana from me.

your totally enkindeled
Tal

"Message to N.Aleksanders, sender unknown" Nicky, how's it going! Hope business is working out oooookay!

So I was poking around some of your files (I'd recommend security updates on some of your employees' passwords. Several need to be instructed that "1234" or "ABCD" are not good ideas for passwords. Especially those who have easy gateways to more secure sections. Consider it just a piece of friendly advice.


Anyways, old chum, I've spent a lot of time reflecting on the last time we actually interacted and all that shit that went down, what with you betraying me and stealing technology and basically being responsible for the death of my fiance and all that....

Well, I've decided it's alllll water under the bridge. All done. In fact, I think we ought to become bestest of friends in these days. Think of it like me and good old Mucky. We hated each other, and now we get along just grandly. I even helped save her life. GodhelpyouifyoueverthreatenheragainorIwillpersonallymakesureeveryfuckingimplantyouhaveisrippedoutonebyoneandyouaremountedonadragonstooth.

Whoopsies. Ignore that last bit. Anger issues. Mea culpa.


Because you see, in my head, there's really no reasons to keep grudges going when there's so, so, so many other things to be working on these days. I mean, we have all the children running around and they really need to have supervision and its never really good for them to see mommy and daddy and uncle and aunty fighting. Wouldn't you agree?


You know, I'm really hoping your company does okay. It's not like I've put a few investments in or anything, or that I'm keeping a nice warm eye on a few of your extracurricular activities. No siree. No but in all seriousness watch where you go walking in the Abyss. Because I'd rather not have to get involved out there.

Anyways, I hope this finds you happy and healthy and more than willing to make up for old problems. It's all totally a non-issue I hope and one we can easily get by. Remember, in times like these we need to keep happy and with our smiles up, or else we fall in the shithole like the rest of all the dumbasses out there.

Toodles!

- Three little Piggies playing in the barn

Private PM to Harrad_01Hey Harrad, it's Juhani. Remember me?

I seem to have gotten a problem at my hands that I can't get out of without picking bad choices and as much as I dislike seeking your help (I don't want to burden you unnecessarily and we barely know each other), I must ask you something.

Can you look after my daughter? Vindi's range isn't a safe place for her anymore but putting her in a nursery would force her to change schools (she's going to same public school with Trex and Eurymedes and Lusia) which I'd rather not like to happen. If she could live with your family until the the situation at the range is solved, I'd be very grateful to you. I'll pay any extra fees her stay incurs to you.

-Juhani

PM to Harrad_01 and Chief Detticia Hey Harrad and Vindi,

It's Asharia. How are the two of you? I'm glad to see that you guys survived the war mostly intact. I'm sorry to hear about Martello, he was a good man. How are Lucia and Laelix doing?

I've been out of contact so long, even though you guys were just up on the Citadel... Maybe we can arrange something to meet up and have the kids have fun together or something. I know Laelix is getting older and Lucia and Holly won't be around his age forever. Heck, eventually Laelix might start looking at me as a potential (not that I expect it, but age-wise...)

Hope to hear back from the two of you.

-
Asharia T'Saeri

PM to asari_Promiscuity
Daia,

There's a lot going on lately... Tanx is okay, don't worry about that, but... I think he's going to go back to Tuchanka for a while. We never did any formal bonding ceremony... so other than Elara, there's nothing legal that ties him to me. I want him to have some kids. Some krogan kids. He deserves to be a proper father for his species. I don't know if he'll come back to the boards or come back to me... maybe eventually, in a few decades... but... I don't know.

I hope you and Ana are doing okay. I heard that Ana... was injured during the war. That sort of disability can't be easy to live with, and I wish the two of you all the best. You both deserve some happiness. Tell Ana I said I'm sorry for whatever part I had, and let her know that Holly's doing okay after the war. Maybe we'll make it out to see you in a year or so if relay travel becomes cheaper. Maybe not.

Good luck to you both,
Asharia

PM to hierarchy_dad
Juhani:

You realize that, by law, she's supposed to be registered and staying at one of the nurturing centers, right? The Hierarchy's been turning a blind eye to a lot of the "private" group homes like Sniper's Touch, but they don't need to. When she comes over here, she'll be here until the orders have been lifted, or she hits boot. I'm not the only parent hoping it'd be the first one, but that's what the situation is.

I suppose the plus side is that there's no cost to you, other than the time to fill out the paperwork.

Let me know.
Harrad.

PM to Reena Tayn; Chieftain Detticia
Ash:

Don't even joke about that. I'm serious. He's seven.

That said, I'll see if he wants to meet up with Holly. I know he'd be happy to meet up with Lucia. Vindi, let us know, and I'll see if we can set something up.

Harrad.

Encrypted Message To User: True Wisdom
Oh, so it was you who switched the lunch menu to read "varren shit", classy. I would say I expected more of you than infantile posturing but, then again, you apparently never recovered after the whole "my girlfriend is a Cerberus operative and tried to kill me and like a dozen other people" episode. I must say I miss your VI in that regard, it only made cryptic threats and fucked with the forum's fonts instead of whinging.

But, in any case, good to see that you're dwelling on past mistakes and not moving on like most normal, sane people (granted going off this message you're probably not either so congrats I guess).

Now, to address your points in no particular order because I am a nice person and so enjoy being bothered by ex-Cerberus affiliates who have an unhealthy fixation with Hellenic code names:

Myrmidon Security Services was contracted out to eliminate Ackling and his subordinates, not serve as your personal army. We are well within our rights to decline requests that go beyond the scope of our original agreement. Furthermore all tech recovered up to and including Ackling's ship is categorized as battlefield salvage and thus a lawful prize.

We are not friends nor equals nor do we have remotely the same interests or goals so would you and that quarian kindly stop pretending we are?

You assume that I have any interest in you beyond a file in an archive. To have a grudge against you implies that I give you enough consideration to consistently waste hours of my life on a pointless pursuit in your name. Sadly no, I reserve that time for gaming and catching up on my book list.

Similarly, you think that I care at all about the reporter beyond the Hagia data you stashed with her (an exceptionally poor idea that, considering that ass all's been done with it and her husband is more than a tad grenade happy). Just in case I have to spell this out for you, which I probably do, I don't. I really, really, don't.

With all due respect (so none really), the moment I need your help to survive in the Abyss is the moment that I deserve to be killed by it.

"Old problems", Barnham let me spell this out for you, "problems" "issues" and "grudges" indicate that this is a mutual thing. I've honestly lost more sleep over failed attempts at cooking than I have over you.

So none at all.

That's what I'm trying to say, I've lost literally no sleep over what a (probably) insane, traumatized, stalker thinks of me. If you had something that I wanted that would be a very different story, if you had anything I needed or if, say, you weren't trying, and failing, to threaten me over a private message then I would care.

Please direct all further messaged to my secretary's spam VI and have a lovely day.

-Nikolai Aleksanders

"Message to N. Aleksanders"
Well, I never.

You try to be friendly and you get throw out to the dogs. Pity. Pity. Pity.

I'm certainly sorry that'd you rather insult than work a deal. I thought that's how your conglomerate types worked these days.

By the way, six of your employees in Chimera Biomedical have been sneaking out with some pretty pricey stuff in the last couple weeks. You also have three frogs working in Myrmidon who I'm almost 75% certain are working for the Special Tadpole Group. Or they really wish they were. Or they're just idiots. Or they're messing with me.... Also the janitors at your Citadel office has been stealing toilet paper from your office. I've enclosed the names with this particular message. See, look, I can be helpful!

I mean, whatever, I'm just going to be the better man if you're going to act all childish.

Sorry about hijacking your secretary's account for this one. Again, having your password be the name of your Moxie is never a good idea.