The Official Private Messages Thread.

Private Message to Bordacit For lockouts I recommend [this] or if you are looking for a free program maybe [this] but it might not be compatible with your omnitool. Also, waiting for a "sound" state of mind may be pushing it, for any species. Good luck with your future employees and/or romantic endeavors.

-Trip

Private Message to TripleTipToe Hah. "Romantic endeavors." That was a romantic endeavor in the same way the Reaper war was a friendly discussion. And it ended just as violently. Anyway, thank you for the recommendations. I'll probably pick up the premium version of that first one. Apparently you can program it to read a prerecorded message aloud if you try to message while inebriated. Think I'll just set it up to play that thread. In its entirety. I imagine that'll sober me up pretty quickly.

Also I noticed you're in Little Rannoch in Tayseri Ward working on those farming... things. If there are any Quarians down there looking for work I'd probably be willing to hire them if you send them my way. Despite my um, recent difficulties with Quarians I'm still a businessman and I still noticed that um, that someone did do excellent work. I was already dangerously short on decent engineers or mechanics before ah...all of this. If you have any recommendations it'd be much appreciated. I know you guys all practically live and breath electronics so-
I mean, um, I'm sure there are Quarians who aren't good with electronics, I'm sure there are lots who are terrible with them and who...

Ugh. Nevermind, I'm just going to stop before I put my foot in my mouth any more than I already have. If there are any Quarians with engineering experience, any at all, send them to me. Have them go to the Bachjret Ward headquarters, though. If a dozen Quarians show up on the doorstep of my store in the Presidium I get the feeling people would talk.
I mean, not that there's anything wrong with that! They would probably just think I liked serving Quarian customers or something and that would be fine! No one on the Presidium has anything against... against... I'm doing it again.

Anyway, send them my way and if they turn out okay I can probably find it in my heart to give you a healthy discount at my stores, personal purchases or bulk. I deal in farming supplies frequently out in the Terminus so I'd almost certainly have things you could use with the projects you work on.

J. Hamilton
This message transcribed via autodictate v.2.73

Private Message to TripleTipToe Oh and um, it's probably asking way too much of you but if you...
She lived in roughly the same area as you work so...
If you see her...
Could you tell her I'm sorry. For everything.
I don't really know how Quarians tell each other apart as well as you seem to but she almost always came in wearing robes that were blue-on-white, if that helps.
If it's too much of a bother I understand.

J. Hamilton
This message transcribed via autodictate v.2.73

Private Message to Star_runner_2170 There's a hovercraft on the way to Shanshan, I don't know your schedule so it might not be there yet when you arrive. Its a 12,000 credit model and I'm budgeting you an additional 10,000 for whatever customizations you see fit to make. Anything over that 10k and it's your money you'll be spending. I expect to see my logo plastered on the all the sides and on your racing jacket. Contact my lawyer here for all the paper work, he's already working on registering you. The craft will end up in storeroom #280760045. I'm doing this on impulse and a fair chunk of that hovercraft is from my own personal account so I hope you make me proud. Because if you don't place in the top 25 I'll be very annoyed.

Oh, and if you just run off with the money I will find you and have you killed.

Ciao,
J. "Uncle Pennybags" Hamilton

Look, I appreciate the "gift," but I don't want to be GIVEN a hovercraft. I want to BUY it. So it's MINE. And so I'm not beholden to anyone who calls himself Mr. Moneybags.

Sorry, not interested.

Private Message to Star_runner_2170It wasn't a "gift," it was a "sponsorship." As in, you shill my products, you get a fancy hovercraft and a healthy budget. There would have been a degree of give and take involved in this. I'm not so rich (or stupid) as to throw away money on some no name Salarian wannabe-racer as a "gift." I was giving you an opportunity to race like you wanted, in a fair-quality craft that you could customize at no expense of your own.

You also obviously failed to even click that contact link I sent you. If you had, my lawyer the honorable Matriarch Slynt would've happily told you that ownership of the hovercraft would be transferred to you after completion of the race, thus it would've been YOURS after you completed the very thing you were aiming to do. I told her to do so, against her own advisement mind you, because I believed that if you took me up and raced, and if you did well and brought in a healthy degree of advertising, that I might buy you out of your present job and have you race full time under my banner bringing much benefit to us both. A job you seem to be jumping to do, in your self-owned, self-customized hovercraft, making much, much more than you do at present.

We humans have an old saying: "Don't look a gift horse in the mouth." Once you've spent five minutes looking up the meaning I'm sure you'll understand that what you had here was a gift horse towing a solid gold cart with diamond encrusted wheels and you didn't just look it in the mouth, you propped a shotgun under its chin and pulled the trigger several times. What a wonderful way to squander an opportunity with a mix of arrogance, foolishness and impatience.

Fondest regards,
J. Hamilton

P.S. Looking forward to seeing you race in the future.

Private Message to Bordacit
...well an endeavor is still an endeavor. I am glad you will be taking proper precautions in the future. And yes I will make people interested in branching out aware of your business...though I am hesitant to recommend a position to females, given your erratic behavior. My people are not in need of instability, you understand, and while naive, you do not seem discriminatory. You seem to put your "foot" in it fairly often. Might I recommend abstaining from vocal transcriptions? It can be beneficial to type out your own words and review them before posting instead of engaging in 'stream of thought' messages that may embarrass you in the future.

And thank you for the future discount. I am never one to turn away a good deal. I look forward to perusing your wares.

-Trip

Postscript: And yes if I see the quarian you are acquainted with I will speak to her. Asking how we recognize each other is a bit silly, though. We all have our ways of marking our individuality. If I see anyone matching your description I will strike up conversation...but blue and white isn't an uncommon color pairing.

Private Message to TripleTipToe I think I can safely say I haven't gone crazy for Quarians, miss. I think it was more just her. Be that as it may, when considering the sort of things I said and our lack of prior interaction I can understand your hesitation completely. Who you send is entirely at your own discretion. I just need engineers, regardless of gender or species. You sending them at all is much appreciated. When they arrive I'll see to it they're put to work immediately. So much to do and so on.

As for my tendency to dictate, I find myself moving throughout the Citadel on a daily basis for business reasons so I haven't much time to sit and type. With my various associates this tends to work out fine but I'm seeing more and more that its a bad idea to dictate when I'm flustered. Which has been happening far more often than I'd like as of late. I'm sorry, I've already bothered you enough with my own problems. I look forward to your patronage.

J. Hamilton
P.S. Thank you. I'll openly admit I don't have high hopes and I doubt she'd listen even if you did manage to find her but...thank you.

PM to Cerastes Hi there,

Just wanted to send a note your way to say it was pleasant meeting you the other night. I have to admit, while I had become a little curious about you since the forum reopened, I'd dismissed the notion of getting a chance to meet in person as unlikely, given our respective professional circles, so it was a pleasant surprise.

I'm sure you have plenty of demands on your time - I'd hardly call myself well-versed in the information trade, but even I know it doesn't tend to reward taking long holidays away from the office - but I hope it won't be too long before we see you around Illium again. At the risk of sounding terribly clichéd, any friend of Ana's is a friend of mine. :)

Good fortune,
Daia

PM to HereToHelp
Hi there,

I've been hearing that you've been having some trouble with gang presence down at LTD. Would you like any help? I could stop by one day to check things out, or maybe I could get my schedule changed to give you some support. Either way, let me know and I'd be happy to see what I can do!

Take care,
D. Cavallius

PM to User: asari_promicuity Mrs. T'Nara:

You are correct in your assumptions regarding free time in the business of information brokering; the only reason I managed to have any personal time off while on Illium was due to physical therapy.

As far as returning to your "neck" of the galaxy goes, it may be quite some time.

Sincerely,
Cerastes S.

Omnimail to "Ana'therion vas Nedas" Mrs. Ana'therion:

Attached is a list of proficient derma-regen specialists within the range of provided terms. I have also included a secondary file that includes a payment plan; do not think of this as a debt, but rather a process.

Should you require an escort to any of these offices, I can have a reputable one provided upon notice.

Good luck.

Sincerely,
Cerastes S.
attch: [AT - Derma Regen.clx], [AT - Payment Plan.clx]

Private Message to Job Dear Biotic human person Job.
I'm uncertain if this will reach you as I'm not familiar with this private extranet exchange system. I hope it does. I must apologize. I was lying in your thread. That was wrong of me and I must again apologize. I am indeed on the station known as Omega. As I said I would like to meet to discuss my services as an information gatherer. I do hear many things since those around me ignore my presence. They believe my mind is gone and that I don't comprehend the things they say. They are mistaken. Usually. I must admit that my thought's stability wax and wane like the moons of planets in the systems in the galaxy. But I am often very lucid. Lucid enough to recall the things they say. Since they don't concern me I would be happy to tell you tthe things I hear. In return for small amounts of credits or food or you assisting me in spreading my WARNING to everyone who needs it. I live mostly on the lower decks so I am exposed to much of the poorer, more destitute of the station's residents. But they are neither poor nor destitute in spirit. I hope to hear a reply. If this reaches you. Which I don'tknow if it will. I eagerly await you're possibly forthcoming response.

So says The Truth.

PM to The Truth
Sorry man, but like I said in the thread, I don't trust just anybody. Fact of the matter is, a lot of my crew have been risking their butts getting this information to broadcast, and a lot of them are persona non grata in some places on Omega right now. Considering these guys are vagrants, that's saying something. So while I do appreciate the help, I'm keeping things on the lowdown for right now. We're broadcasting, but we're minimizing our sphere of exposure. No offense. Still, feel free to contribute to the threads or forward any info you find when we broadcast. Information has a right to be free. But we just can't meet.

Apologies,

Job

Private Message to Taleeze Your comments and actions including the not so subtle "stress relief" one are leading me to think otherwise, asari. Especially since I have been down this road several times before. Someone sees that I am a "bitch," learns that I am an exile and assumes that my major problem in life is a lack of companionship. That if they are "nice" to me and act is if they understand me that I will throw off my mask and commence the disgusting act of slobbering all over their ugly face like some kind of varren.

And yes, while I occasionally enjoy discussing my people's history before it was tainted. I do it when I want to. I am not your personal quarian codex that spouts off random facts about her people at the drop of a hood. So please use a basic extranet search function if you really want to learn something as you say.

As for what I regard you as? an annoyance.

PM to JobDear human biotic Job.
I am very glad my message reached you, human biotic. I was worried it would not. Did you see my worry in my previous message? I should have considered that there are those that would wish you and your ilk harm. Many do not wish to see messages distributed. I have encountered them in my own travels. Store owners, C-sec officers, QUARIANS. QUARIANS HATE ME and hated mine, but if you do not wish to meet I understand and will not push the envelope. Or issue, I can't recall which is the correct idiom. I would never wish to unknowningly bring down harm on you or anyone you care about. Or anyone to be harmed at all. WHich is why I must spread my WARNINGS of the return of the BLUE SHIPS of the REAPERS. But you are here. On the same site as I am so I am sure you already know of my warnings. I will not preach to the choir, as it were. As I said in your Omega thread I feel you and I are kindred spirits and I would like to aid you however I can. I think I am grounded enough to recognize things that you would find important. Or interesting. Important and interesting. If I see anything important and interesting in my travels on Omega I will alert you to it. Please do not tell anyone I am on Omega. I believe there are people looking for me and at the moment don't know that I am on Omega. Please do not tell anyone I am on Omega.

Perhaps someday circumstances will bring us to see each other.
The Truth.

Encrypted Message to User: Nikolai Aleksanders, CEO of TitanCorp
Dear Mr. Aleksanders:

My name is Sandra Cole. I represent an independent entity looking to sell a unique neurochemical agent discovered among the flora of an uncolonized frontier world. It has an interesting effect on the neural pathways of humans that if harnessed by the right people, may likely garner a significant profit. As detailed [here], people who ingested the base form of the compound became increasingly compliant and suggestible to authority figures.

They also lost comprehension of complex ideas, such as written language, but were still capable of simple tasks, as ordered by their authority figure. Once the compound is removed from their diet, the effects eventually diminish to the point of minimal to no permanent damage.

If you are interested in learning more, and obtaining a sample for verification, we would be more than happy to find mutual accommodating arrangements.

Sincerely,

Sandra Cole

Encrypted PM to User:4Eyes4TheWin
Dear Mr. Ranak

My name is Sandra Cole. I represent an independent entity looking to sell an interesting compound discovered from the flora of an uncolonized world. The neurochemical compound has a fascinating effect on the human neuro synapses of human beings. Specifically, once put into their system, either through injection or ingestion, the subjects become increasingly compliant to any available authority figure.

They also find comprehending complex ideas like simple written language impossible, and even the spoken language is disjointed, but are perfectly capable of feeding themselves and performing simple tasks without fear of noncompliance, so long as the neurochemical compound is removed from their system. Once the compound is removed, the subjects return to their previous state with little to no permanent damage, as these files can testify.

If you're interested in learning more, please contact me at your earliest convenience.

Encrypted message to user:Delta Q Dear Ms Cole,

First of all thank you very much for contacting Slaves4Us.
I am glad to say that I immediately passed on your proposition to my superiors, and they're very much interested. Please inform us of how you would like to proceed for the collection of the sample, it'll of course be entirely on our dime.

Very cordially,

Bintar Ranak

PM to PariahHello Kari

I am a bit saddened about your last message. Illium is half a galaxy away and I am not interested in any of the things you think. I feel really sorry if my thoughtless words offended you. The comment on “stress relief” was totally directed at your previous one about watching when you need a laugh. This was all.

So I won’t annoy you any further.
Just let me express my thanks for the help you provided regarding the dances and I’ll leave it to you if you want to ever talk about quarian culture again. I would appreciate it.
Be well!

Encrypted PM To: Bintar Ranak
Dear Mr. Ranak

Thank you, but that won't be necessary. We can safely handle our owns means of transportation. As for a meeting place, our first choice would be aboard the commonly called The Wreck space station. We will meet you at the Nova Dawn freighter bar, in precisely four days. Dress appropriately.

Sincerely,

Sandra Cole

Encrypted Message to: Sandra Cole [From the Desk of Nikolai Aleksanders]
Ms. Cole,

At the risk of sounding crass, I feel that making an informed decision regarding your offer requires independent verification of the subject material. Therefore I request a sample of the agent be sent to Warehouse 8T-313 in the Nazav District on Cartagena Station no less than seven galstan days prior to your scheduled meeting.

You are, of course, more than welcome to take what countermeasures you see fit.

Sincerely,
Nikolai Aleksanders; CEO and Chairman

Encrypted PM: Nikolai Aleksanders
Mr. Aleksanders:

That is not unreasonable. The sample will arrive shortly at the specified location. Once you've verified the results, we will be hosting a meeting at the Nova Dawn entertainment center aboard The Wreck space station, where I will be selling the compound alongside one other prospective purchaser. The meeting is set four days from now, but if you feel that is insufficient time, we can reschedule.

Sincerely,

Sandra Cole