The Official Private Messages Thread.

Private Message to user: Mr_Sandman
Mr. Aleksanders,


It would be preferable to have the shuttles delivered to this address in one weeks time. I would like to have the weapons in four weeks or so. The other objects are for a more personal reason and can come as they are available.

Lyra Palmer

Private Message to Asari_Promiscuity
Going to Illium was a mistake. Chris and I have been at each other's throats;
I'm been irritable, sure, but she seems to have a chip on her shoulder and -
This trip wasn't what I thought it would be. I'm not sure I want to stay.
If you want to meet, then we can meet. I'm sure she'd be thrilled about it.

Encrypted to Email to pworag@bluesuns.co.pmc To: Pvt. Peregrinus Worag
From: Lt. Col. Arthur Daye
BCC: Ctrn. Lucas Dunn
Re: Unofficial Transfer Request

Pvt. Worag,

Interesting choice of place to indicate an interest in transfer to my unit. Even more interesting timing. You want to serve under a CO who's flat-out said he doesn't like lizards like you, have it your way. Guess you have a quad or whatever the fuck it is your kind says.

Put your CV through official channels and I'll have a look at it. We're pretty close to top programmed strength right now, though, so no promises. It's supplies we need right now, not people.

v/r,

Lt. Col. Arthur Daye

CO 9 Commando, 5th Mech. Bde.

Encrypted email to arthurd@bluesuns.co.pmc To: Lt. Col. Arthur Daye
From: Pvt. Peregrinus Worag
Re: Re: Unofficial Transfer Request

No sir, my statement you are referring to was meant to be humorous and not serious question at the krogan in your unit. However you will know through official channels if I choose to seek transfer to 9 Commando, which is unlikely in close future.

Pvt. Peregrinus Worag

14th Heavy Assault Brigade, 5th Mech. Div.

Private Message to VigilantVanguard Hi Sarah,

I'm very sorry to hear that; I don't know how much it's a contributing factor, but Illium can be like that, some people it just 'rubs up the wrong way' (for all sorts of understandable reasons).

I'd be happy to meet, though, whenever suits you - talk things over, or just take your mind off everything for a little while, whatever you'd like. I promise to wear something normal this time. ;)

Love,
Daia

Reply to asari_promiscuity
Name a time and place.

Private Message to VigilantVanguard I know just the place - I'll swing by the Mavic Chen to pick you up around eighteen? See you soon! :)

Private Message to Fun Loving TurianHey Tellix, some comic book artist wants a nude krogan for reference with pot of mayonnaise (real mayonnaise, that's not an euphemism!) at Kithoi. DO you think Takkar would volunteer?

Also, salarian might be needed. Can you solicit services of one enough brave for that?

Encrypted Message to User: Palmer[From the Desk of Nikolai Aleksanders]

Ms. Palmer,

Understood. Our price is attached, we project that the requested items will be en route, in bulk, in one gal-stan week's time. Transit will require a minimum of one but no more than two additional weeks.

It was a pleasure doing business, as always.

Sincerely,
Nikolai Aleksanders; CEO and Chairman

Private Message to Juju! Juju! <3
Takky is not available, he's on Palaven, for business and pleasure >:3 Salarians? Well I know there are some on Illium, but they cost a bunch, unless if you can seduce them, hint: they do like horn rubs... It sounds like my kind of party you're having.

Listen I would love to chat with you... hells I would love to have you over so we can have some fun but they're expecting me in the new Rio enclave in two hours. So you'll have to do with this.

[highly explicit description of human/turian activities]
See You Later <3

Private Trideo to Archmagus[There is only a single file in trideo format attached to the message, titled 'Watch This']

[The recording starts with a view of the Omega garrison's firing range. Garritroopers blasting targets off-duty can be seen down the lane. Then a krogan in Blue Suns hardsuit of all things walks into the camera's view. He looks quite unassuming, leathery turtle-like skin of older krogan hanging from his face, red and hostile eyes...but Worag's dark brown crest looks like it has seen better days alright. Giant spider's web of small cracks adorn it, originating from a deep dent on his left side of the crest. Someone or something must have hit him there hard, but didn't finish the job.]

"Maggles. Archmagus. Cassius Tychon, Aquila's buttbuddy, take your pick. Since you're so hurt about being stuck in ass-end of Terminus in the rain, I figured I'd do this little trideo to cheer you up. After all, you complain about missing the Terminus Unlimited Expo! As a fellow Suns, it is my duty to help out a comrade in arms and show all the shit you've missed out. This might end up being an educational experience too!"

[Worag lifts up an assault rifle onto the bench before him with a loud *THUNK*. He runs his hand over the thing's barrel slowly with care, as if caressing a newborn in the cradle, giving the gun a longing look. Then he focuses back on the camera, his gaze devoid of any emotion that the firearm received.]

"This thing here is a KalWalidija Armaments Storm Rifle mark 5. That's quite a mouthful, ain't it? So I'm gonna call it just the storm rifle like anyone sensible would. Why that? Let me demonstrate to you."

[The krogan tucks the rifle under his arm and picks up something that looks like old-fashioned stripper clip with his free hand...except this clip holds five heat sinks in it. Worag loads it into the gun and lifts it to his shoulder, and aims. The camera moves to give the viewer a sight down the lane and the gun. There's a lone holographic target standing at 100 meters.

Worag opens fire at it. True to its name, the storm rifle unleashes a torrent of projectiles. He fires in short bursts to keep his aim straight. The poor hologram's hit counter in the side of the screen shows a considerate portion of shots hitting their target. Then Worag just forgoes trigger discipline and holds the trigger down and the audio is filled with ungodly cacophony of mass-accelerated gunfire. The camera cuts away to the other shooters who are looking at Worag's booth in utter disbelief.

Finally the gunfire stops and the gun chucks out white-hot heat sink stripper. Worag turns to face the camera.]

"20 shots per sink, 100 in total by patented KalWalidija En-Bloc Sink Action(tm), and that's just one sink clip. On top of that, the storm rifle has an internal gyro-compensator to mitigate recoil and enable the user keep their gun on target.

[Worag pulls the gun up and flicks a switch on the body of the rifle. The barrel swings up, revealing the accelerator and ammo block feed in the box and accelerator coil around the barrel. He swings the barrel back into place.]

"Easily maintainable in the field with propietary tools and accepts common off-the-shelves components as replacements. One of the finest guns in the Terminus."

[Worag gives the camera a truly sinister look with a shit-eating grin.]

"That's why the Vonskar coalition has chosen it for their top of the line troopers this year. I managed to con the KalWalidija presenter into giving this to me for a test drive, he just saw credits in his eyes when I mentioned I'm from a large mercenary outfit. Let's see how it takes for him to remember the Suns are fighting their biggest employer on Tsombesha...Fortunately for you, Vonskar hired Eclipse to deal with you guys over there, but who knows how much logistical support they're getting from the coalition military?"

[He sets down the gun.]

"Keep your head down, Maggles. Would be a shame if Aquila lost his beloved out there to this beast, heheh.

[Recording ends.]

Private Message to: pworag@bluesuns.co.pmc
...riiiiiight.

Much as 'm flattered that you took the time to go out 'n make this just for little old me (must've been a hassle, given your busy busy schedule) I'd just like to say that, you know, think I'm gonna be just fine tbh.

Vonskar hasn't got shit in the way of a military left (ya know, kinda why they had to hire on the yellowbellies in the first place) an while I know between fuck an all about the overall shape of their logistics train I can tell you two things. One: any decently put together corp (including fucking Eclipse sadly) is going to procure their own guns an armor; they're not going to rely on their fucking employers to do it for them (again, kinda the point of hiring a corps in the first place; own guns, own training). Two: that thing's a battle rifle trying to be an LMG.

Now, lemme explain what that means. Rifles like the Vindicator (which virtually every Legionnaire uses) maximize penetration at the cost of output. Which is, you know, fine. We've got dedicated guys for suppressing fire an having a couple dozen decent marksmen in the field is a fucking godsend for a CO. But anyway, the thing is yellowbellies kinda work like that. They don't like spray an prey anymore than we do. If anything they're even more fucking uptight about it than we are. So the idea of 'em arming their basic grunts with a fucking heavy knock off LMG is literally laughable. Second point is that that thing eats through ammo like pretzels. Twenty shots per sink? Hundred if you wedge that chunk of metal in your gun?

Avenger gets 30 per sink an you don't need to slot up a new cartridge with five clips while under fire.

Phaeston? Yeah, that gets 50.

And you know the really hilarious thing about both of those? They're fucking everywhere and they're dirt cheap. That top of the line, fresh out of R&D storm rifle you got there? How much did it set you back? Can't tell me it's got cutting edge "internal gyro-compensator to mitigate recoil and enable the user keep their gun on target" an then tell me it's cheap in the same breath.

I'd say maybe it makes a decent battle rifle you know? Got that accuracy going for it, would fuck up shields 'n armor. Well, I would say that 'cept, like I said earlier we've already got shit that does the same thing, except better an with a lot fewer rounds. So not a good battle rifle then.

LMG? Mean, it does put out a fuckton of fire. But, 'gain, problem with that is that gyro-compensator shit jammed up in it. That only works well if you're gunning for one person. LMGs are meant to suppress entire groups an, odds are, you're not even gonna have a definite fix on the people you're keeping pinned down.

Plus, again, shit like the Revenant (60 round per sink btw) that does that job better.

So yeah. It's heavy, bulky, awkward to load. We wouldn't want, Eclipse wouldn't want it. Expensive. Strain on supply lines. Over generalized. Already cheaper shit that does the job better. A hi tech new toy for a state that doesn't know the difference between it's ass an a hole in the group when dealing with their own soldiery basically.

But, you know, I'm sure it'll look all shiny an pretty sitting in your locker.

You useless cunt.

-Corporal Tychon.

Private Message to asari_promiscuity Hey, Daia!

I am so excited, I just have to share! Earlier today I finally signed a deal with Ariake Entertainemnt, they'll license my tech armor mod as customizable electronic costume!
So now I am a contracted entertainment engineering developer, yay! The Apricity will be the showcase for the new designs before they go to the extranet shop!

How's Illium doing without it's top attorney?

In fact, you need to know, it's all going perfect and we are so happy. I think we'll have to pay extra for excessive use of the bed when we check out though. And do you believe, Sky's exchanging letters with Freh'ya already, like, behind my back? What have I gotten myself into?
The two seem to be on a wavelength this is fantastic. It takes her mind off her own issues it seems. That extended holiday on Nevos will be good, I am absolutely sure now. I wouldn't be where I am now without you, love!

hugs and kisses. I will never forget that, never. <3
the happiest Taleeze in the galaxy

Private Message to Natalie King
Hey, Nat.

I didn't mean to offend you with the giant monster rib.
[here] are some pictures from beautiful Illium! I've never seen buildings this tall!
How are you and yours doing? :D

Sarah

to here to help *coughYou know damn well boss, and that fuckin' stunt at the docks. The next time we have that conversation, it won't be a conversation.

Private Message to Taleeze Hi!

A song for the triumphant Maiden! We got the good news when the deal was completed - Ariake's local reps have already scheduled a meeting with Eafina to talk about Apricity as a showcase site, and from the sounding-out Charisma's done that might result in a neat little package of publicity in the tech news services once everything's set up. (Speaking of promotion, just to pop the idea into your head nice and early, what would you say to a dance at Bliss? I'm looking to do my usual handful of shows wherever I can squeak into the schedule on the smaller cabaret stages, and Ariake's not shy about showing off its wares at an adult festival. Might be something worth suggesting next time you speak with them.)

I think we'll manage to survive a little while longer without Skylar keeping an eye on us, so by all means you hold onto her a while longer - she'll love Nevos (the place, as well as the company, I'm sure). Wonderful to hear how happy you two are, and that Freh'ya's getting to know her too. Skylar's quite a woman, I have no doubt you'll both be counting yourselves lucky to have snared her (and I can only imagine how happy she'll be!)

You've done the hard work, now enjoy the fruits of your labour, as they say. Ana's writing a letter to Skylar (for both of you, I gather, I'm sure Sky will read out the good bits), but I'll put her love to you here as well anyway. Have fun!

Love,
Daia

PS: Take her to the Authority if you get the chance, evidence suggests it's good luck for new couples. ;)

Private Message to asari_promiscuity Goddess, don’t make me feel awkward! :P
Am I now a businesswoman, ha? It’s good to see them get going so fast. I already received a list of ideas to sample and try out on stage. Lucky break for the Blooming Maiden in Astella which is where I currently head two nights a week while staying at home. I’ll send ‘Fina the data to give to someone like Labrisa to try.

And would I dance at the Bliss? Sure would I dance at the Bliss! That’s a great idea, I didn’t even have time to think about that. What would you say to a double between the two of us? I think Ariake will have a stand there. They are seriously upgrading with force-feedback nerve stims. And have you seen their latest line of omnitoys?

Send Ana my regards, I look forward to hear from her!
<3 <3

Private Message to Advance
Hey, how much would it take for you to give the fishstick to Emon Spiza?

Private message to VigilantVanguardNowhere near enough.

Private message to VigilantVanguardPerhaps I should elaborate. This swordfish of mine, this…Fishjolnr if you will, is of deep sentimental meaning to me. As it appears its owner has joined the great Turn of the Wheel, such a toy has become immeasurably valuable to people who knew him such as me. Parting with it now, after spending this long searching for him, would be akin to me asking you how much it would cost to strap your wife down, nude, and take a paring knife to her eyes as you cooed “row row row your boat” in her screaming face.

It is, shall we say, a touch inappropriate.