I hate to ask this of you people, but I have no other choice.

... that came out bit more dramatic than I'd intended. I should clarify.

I hate to ask this of you people because it is not only embarrassing and undignified, but also because it will likely bring every squealing, irritating, mentally handicapped manchild here from every corner of the extranet. However, I seem to have little choice on the matter, because every time I search the extranet myself, I either get redirected to galactipedia (which is useless) or to some bizarre fansite (which is filled with screaming prepubescents that just learned how to curse).

My point is this; what in the name of River of Slaughter is Void Channel Monsters.

I ask because one of our patients is undergoing a lung transplant later this week, and the little creature has an absolute obsession with the damned things. He told me at length about a "Tarruvon" and a "Lumivon" and a "Smish-Smash" and other nonsense while I was examining him, and I'll be damned if I could understand half the things he was talking about. All I took away from the child was that Smish-Smash has an attack value of 8, is a 'space elemental' (whatever that is), and is opposed by "Karuga."

Can someone please direct me to a site that explains this nonsense? I would rather my next visit with this patient not involve me smiling and staring like an idiot while this child rambles on, expecting a reply.

It's a game for the omni-tool. Basically, you're a monster catcher and tamer. You collect projected codes on billboards, advertisements and magazines to collect rarer monsters with a part of the program- ((The codes are randomly tagged by a marketing firm on the Citadel) and you build up an army of monsters and train them. It helps teach younger people organization skills, it fosters urban exploration and a sense of curiosity.

It's a little too fresh for my blood, but I've played a few rounds of it. I'm more interested in simulation and strategy games.
I really like the games Jeral makes.

Goblin help Doksornn find codes, find Smishsmash! Be strong monster master to help kid!

<What then occurs is a rapid stream of pictures to Sornn's omnitool, as Goblin skitters about, taking pictures of seemingly every billboard, advertisement, or brightly colored object in sight. And an antique stop sign.>

So, wait. I take a picture of any billboard? Or just specific ones? And how many of these damned monsters are there? Because I've been asked about my 'favorite' monster about twenty times now and the child can't seem to understand I don't have one.

Well-

[Here] is where you download the game (for a small price, it's on sale with GameBomb, use the code "REAPER")
It comes with a scanner that projects a flash-light like green light that causes the codes to glow, color-coded for the monster's type. Not every billboard or ad has them, you'll have to look for them. You can usually find a few dozen in market areas and plazas.

... This is becoming intensely complicated. They expect children to play this?

It's easy once you figure it out.

Just walk around with a nice drink and scan things, or you can play the game and just catch monsters from there. The scanned monsters usually are rarer/stronger.

It is entirely possible that children have no idea what they are doing and only play it because they think the monsters look "cool". I will leave it up to you to decide whether or not they are.

Alright, I've downloaded the damned game. I can't understand half the instructions - they're all translated from salarian into thessian and then back into galstan again, so I'm being asked to "please in case register product likeness for great possibilities of deals without opening horse carriage." Apparently I need to press this button? I don't know. The GUI is a riot of color and jelly-bean like buttons and-

Okay, something's happening, it's-

By Valahira, what is it doing!? Stop that!

WHY IS THIS IS ON MY OMNITOOL NOW

Because sad looking toaster cyclops count as a reward I guess? Maybe because its ejecting its own brain or something

I swear, I'm dreading the point where my kid will latch onto something like this, and I'll the ensuing litter of bright colors and piercing noise pollute my home. Ugh.

It, uh, looks like you activated the game and it gave you something to start off with.

I think. I don't install this garbage on my omni-tool.

So is that Smish-Smash?

I think I remember Tarix playing this once.

One day he got into a fight with some other kids over who deserved the "rare Polyx'mop" more. In the end, he came home crying because a salarian kid took it for himself.

Honestly, I don't really like the idea of children getting arguments over virtual pets in a game like this, I think the people who made this should have made sure to prevent that sort of thing from happening.

Epher, if your child lost a game he can download off the extranet and is only available in digital format, I'd be more concerned about that than losing a fight to a salarian. Stop forcing drama into a discussion about children's toys.

Speaking of which, this ... toaster? It's called... Toastvon. Original. I suppose.

I suppose Toastvon will now be my favorite void channel monster, because I can't figure out a damned thing to do with it.

I don't think it was the game he lost, from what he saying it was one of those things in the game. Something about trading monsters or something? I can't remember.

I didn't say this earlier, but Doctor, I think you should be commended for going the extra mile for this kid. It says a lot about you that you're willing to deal with this kind of thing for a child's happiness.

What an exciting life you must lead, if a man giving you his own experience with said children's toy- which you yourself asked from the respondents of this thread, might I add- counts as 'drama'.


Or you could stop delegating the responsibility for parenting onto people whose job it isn't to raise your child.

I don't see how this is negative, in any case. Sooner or later he will have to learn to cope with setback and disappointment, and the reality in life that you won't always get your way. Put it down as a learning experience, for him and you both.

are you still on watson? how's that been? did hackett dissolve the PRC government there, too? didn't hear much about her since the war ended.

Fair enough, I suppose. That incident was ages ago to begin with, so I'm not sure if the company who makes this has done anything to remedy such incidents.

But still, I decided to go do a search on the extranet to see what a Polyx'mop looks like:



...Well, then.

What...what the hell is that? It looks like a Reaper Foetus shadow hybrid thing

Kids get into fights over this?!

Children will literally fight over anything.